Original article posted by ravenpaine:

At some point in my life I intend for everything to go well and to stop blaming myself for the times when they do. This is not that time, especially since I can’t capitalize anything without trying three times and nearly resorting to pushing the capslock key to facilitate the process.

Grrr.

The problem I suffer from currently is probably the problem I suffer from the most, which is to go with the flow because that’s the whole point. I.E. when things start going the way you want them to you assume that they will stay the course and your life will just keep getting better. This is rarely true, left unattended most things will steer mischeviously to the left like a shopping cart past its retirement date.

Today’s problem (damn that capitilization thing) is that I have this particular female that I talk to on rare occasions that I have began (began nothing, I’m four months in) to put too much stock in everything she says and does. I live for any moment where I will be acknowledged and every word of advice or encouragement is followed thoroughly and often without any thought to the reprucussions or legitimacy of said advice.

And of course there is the gaps in time where you want to say things that you should not. Things that will end poorly when they are said. Particularly when what you want to say and what you will say are based upon how you feel for artificial comforts that don’t get at the core emotion that you want to express. Stated another way, don’t wander around telling people you love them just because they are nice to you. Ultimately this sort of water-headed thinking gets you thrown out of universities and leaves you wondering for years what would have happened had you not been an idiot the entire time.

Wisely I have stayed mum on this sort of thing, foolishly I haven’t given up any of the actions or thoughts that will eventually lead to me failing an impulse check and spilling it all anyway. My only useful course of action is to flee desperately into the night, which is probably why that particular action appears on the bottom of the list of possible alternatives that I may take.

In conclusion I would like to state that I will fail poorly and quickly and someone somewhere needs to explain to me why it is that I should avoid doing things that all of my rational bits have already Magna Carta’d into a completely fallible course of action.

Nuh, I said Magna Carta’d like it means something.

Rodney TGAP
first of a dying breed

Orginal comments:


Nickname: Greg
Re: Why I hate me
If nothing else, you have a talent for writing. Heck, you used Magna Carta’d in an entry. There aren’t many who could get away with that.

Not that you get away with that.

Anyway, sorry to hear you’re feeling nuh. We need to have a dinner before friday of next week. Scaldoni’s or even Cheesecake factory may be in order.

Ponder amongst yourselves. (and that’s applicable in this case.)

-Graphite Shoulder Man.

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