Original article posted by Greg:

Move calls did not come in until Saturday, and move day wasn’t till today. So that’s why my latest message is on time rather than early.

On Saturday morning the phone rang. I assumed it was move calls. In addition to move calls, President Perkins has to personally call anybody who is being called or released from any special callings, such as senior companion, district leader, zone leader, Assistant to the President, or any office staff position. Well, anyway, it wasn’t move calls, it was President. But he wanted to speak with my companion. So Elder Taylor found up his DL time was served and he was free to move to TaoYuan. Which he just did this morning. Then President hung up and we waited for move calls to tell me who my new companion would be and who our new DL would be.

I think that because I have made this into an adventurous story kind of thing rather than just telling you how move-calls turned out you probably know what happens next.

The phone rings again, but it’s not move-calls. It’s President again, and he wants to me.

President Perkins likes to play with my mind.

I told him that he tricked me because by hanging up I figured I was in the clear for another move call. He said sorry, but not true. So he called me as senior companion. I said okay, and he gave me a bit of advice which I do not remember in the slightest because at the time I was thinking “Crap, I can’t even speak Chinese. What am I going to do now?” Then he said “Okay. Oh, wait, one other thing.”

President Perkins likes to play with my mind.

So now I’m senior and DL, too. I’m not too worried about the DL stuff, but the whole leading of this companionship thing gives me the shakes. I guess we’ll see what happens. I only hope it turns out I can manage to shake off the habit of not converting anybody to the Gospel of Jesus Christ that seems to have followed me around for the past 4.5 months.

Elder Frazier, my new companion, is a USU student (piano major) starting
his 4th movecall here. His Chinese is pretty good. He at least seems
to know more vocabulary words than me, which is good, cause I may need his help in that area. He seems like a subdued kinda guy. Other than that I have no idea what kind of person he is. I’ve only known him for 2 hours.

In other news, if anybody is interested in moving to Taiwan for 6 months or so, I know a lady who owns a kindergarten who wants an American to come and teach english. The requirements are that you have to (A) look like an American, and (3) you have to be able to be here within like a month or so. You don’t have to speak Chinese, as all the teachers speak pretty okay english, and there are 2 American couples here teaching already who can speak Chinese. Also you have to be willing to live in this Hua Lien area of Taiwan for half a year or so. But they tell me the pay is pretty okay, for Taiwan, and there’s always lots of chinese people wanting to take you out to eat.

So anyway, I guess let me know. Or have your people call my people. But mainly it would require getting a Visa ASAP, which I don’t have any idea about.

So what else is new? The puppies in the weeds across the street all
vanished about 4 days ago. We figure somebody took them. The mother dog follows us around whining and howling, as if we’ll be able to lead her to them. I feel really sad every time I see her. I know it’s a stupid thing to get sad about, but I do.

Our only progressing investigator, Mr. Lin, is in the habit of playing
bomberman online till about 4 am every day. So getting up for church
is a challenge to him. He even went so far as to tell us last friday that he simply will not come to church. We tried everything we could to convince him to come, but he said no way. Then on sunday morning we arrived at the church only to find him there already. Good feeling.

Other than that, I can’t think of much to say.

My heartfelt thanks to all those who have left me notes. I love to get them, and never have time to reply to them. But thanks, nonetheless.

I just used two words I don’t really know how to define in a dictionary. Heartfelt, and nonetheless.

Please send pictures of yourself doing foolish things for money.

-Elder Awesome

P.S. Happy birthday to all who have one within 4 weeks of this date. Especially Julia, because she didn’t get anything from me.

Orginal comments:

Nickname: Cornelius
Re: New jobs for all. Then drastic pay cuts for all.
You owe me a letter. Also, thanks for the happy birthday and my address is changing. Send further correspondence to HCR Box 500 Garrison, UT 84728. I have an address where I will be training, but I don’t trust it to international mail, as it’s on a military post. That goes many times extra for Iraq. This is where my parents live. It’s not going to change. Ever. Have fun being DL and senior whatever. I will try to send you pictures of me doing stupid things for money, but most of the stupid things that I will be doing (or for that matter, have ever done) will be classified. Sorry.